
Oh my gosh, you guys
This film merits no praise, just
Shudders and screencaps

It hurts to think of
The huge piles of cash Thoda
Flushed down the toilet

Not to mention stars
Rani, Saif--and four children
Who deserved far better

If this kid is nine,
I'm twenty-one (oh, I wish)
I liked the ladka

Kunal: "kids' movie"
Usually precludes this
Though her boobs are nice

In the States, we wear
Seatbelts, and produce better
Actors than this guy:

Though I can see why
You'd fail to believe me, based
On his performance

In short, I hate it
And besides these two songs, there's
Nothing to enjoy
Avoid, yaar, and watch
Hum Tum again to banish
This awful movie

Thik hai, Shahid, you
Can brighten my depression
By looking awesome:

This film merits no praise, just
Shudders and screencaps

It hurts to think of
The huge piles of cash Thoda
Flushed down the toilet

Not to mention stars
Rani, Saif--and four children
Who deserved far better

If this kid is nine,
I'm twenty-one (oh, I wish)
I liked the ladka

Kunal: "kids' movie"
Usually precludes this
Though her boobs are nice

In the States, we wear
Seatbelts, and produce better
Actors than this guy:

Though I can see why
You'd fail to believe me, based
On his performance

In short, I hate it
And besides these two songs, there's
Nothing to enjoy
Avoid, yaar, and watch
Hum Tum again to banish
This awful movie

Thik hai, Shahid, you
Can brighten my depression
By looking awesome:

*Concept blatantly stolen from Gemma.
Hahahaha...a dash of Shahid can lighten up your mood. Wah Fangirl Wah !!!
ReplyDeleteIt was only Good Music which led me to hall for this bad bad movie. Only 'thing' good was 'Amisha' New & Improved :P
How could a movie with Saif and Rani go so horribly wrong (I've really enjoyed them together)? While I dont' currently have this one, I probably would have seen it at some point.
ReplyDeleteYou are a born Bollywood poet! Lol gulzar has nothing on you, i was so embarassed for the actors in this movie why would you do this!!!
ReplyDeleteI liked this one!!! It's a kids' movie for sure but still very, very sweet.
ReplyDeleteThat said, I do have an insanely large sweet tooth! ;D
Couldn't agree more with your haiku-jujitsu on TPTM, Ajnabi. Saif's performance (and the talented kids) barely rescued this one from being sailed out our window like a frisbee. Rani is sadly wasted, the music is mediocre, the special effects painfully bad, and the commercial plugs more cringe-worthy even than usual.
ReplyDeleteI liked this movie - it is a simple sweet movie - saif, rani and the kids were good. It makes for a good change from the usual fare
ReplyDeleteHahaha. Sorry you didn't like it that much but me likes!! I saw it again with my daughter and still likes
ReplyDeleteThis movie was final proof to me that Rani has wasted her momentum and career after 2006.
ReplyDeleteWhat is she thinking doing stuff like this? I thought TRRP was bad but this was worse.
Gemma says:
ReplyDeleteWah wah! Ajnabi!
You have raised the bar for me :-)
Thanks for the warning!
I didn't watch this because Ta Ra Rum Pum (or whatever its stupid name was) was so abysmal I couldn't bear to take the risk. Sounds like a rewatch of Hum Tum will suffice for a Rani-Saif fix.
ReplyDeleteWhat a review! Mind-blowing ;-)
ReplyDeleteI liked the movie though..family-friendly entertainment (except Amisha's unwanted appearance of course!)..rest was fine for me.
PS I love your Shahid-craze! hehehe
Thank you all very much for visiting & commenting!
ReplyDeleteDarshit: Ameesha *did* look really good. Too bad it was wasted on this film. :-(
shell: As you can see from the other comments, it does "work" for other people. Just not for me. LOL So it might be worth a try in the future.
Rum: Shukriya, and I have no idea what they were thinking ("Ta Ra Rum Pum was so awesome! Let's do it again!").
Filmi Girl: I have a huge sweet tooth too, I promise, and have been known to watch Lilo & Stitch with none of my children present. It wasn't the sugar that turned me off, it was the unsuitability for kids. A kids' movie that's inappropriate for its intended audience fails on its own terms, IMO. Blood, parents dying, revenge-bent children playing truly harmful pranks, some guy caressing a girl's bosom onscreen--not cool, nor--for me, and I realize I'm being subjective but then what's the point of a blog if I can't be?--is the idea of a god who gives out "plus points" and breaks people's legs if they get too prideful, yk?
Pessimisissimo: Y'know, there is something that really hooks me about the kids & Saif's interactions. They, and "Nihaal Ho Gayi," are what kept this DVD intact. But I only have 4 scenes I'll be willing to re-watch.
Anonymous: I'm glad that you liked it; I certainly wouldn't want to ruin the film for anyone who enjoyed it. :-)
Nicki: Thik hai, one out of ten is still pretty good, right? LOL
Anonymous2: I really, really hope Dil Bole Hadippa is a success, because Rani is just awesome and deserves better than the roles she's chosen. (And better advisers than those she's got.)
Gemma:
You set the bar, dear
So it's only natural
That I should try too
Memsaab: I dunno, it depends on your tolerance of fuzzy filmi theology (and I know you lean towards atheist, so this might be okay or really annoying, depending). I'm fine with Evan Almighty stuff, but not this type, y'know? But the special effects are abysmal, as Pessimisissimo said.
Bhargav: Thanks! And, I didn't find it all that family-friendly (see remarks to Filmi Girl) but maybe that was just me. I'm starting to think it was. LOL And yeah. Shahid's job as Official Mascot includes the duty of brightening up posts about movies I don't like. ;-D
Add me to those who liked the film. I thought it was a cute time-pass, especially in the second half where the kids and Saif bonded. I liked Lazy lamhe too - the song, more than the video. The video is perhaps a tad adult for a kids' movie, but considering what else makes it to Indian TV (all those "sexy" remix videos, all those filmi "item" numbers) I dont think in the Indian context, its all that objectionable.
ReplyDeleteAnd hey, "Blood, parents dying, revenge-bent children playing truly harmful pranks" - sounds like Harry Potter to me (except for the revenge-bent children bit) and that IS considered kid-fare.
PS: more such Haiku, please! :-)
ReplyDeleteHi bollyviewer: Glad you liked it. :-) I don't let my kids watch Harry Potter, either, for the same reasons, so at least I'm consistent. ;-) And I'll definitely keep the haiku in reserve for the next film I detest. LOL
ReplyDeleteajanabi,
ReplyDeleteI admit it, I saw it. Lekin, there was one thing I was able to get out of the film and that's a screen cap of the Hollywood sign that Rani's character changed to read "Bollywood."
I didn't care for the film, BUT really loved the bonus disc with the launch party for the movie given for disadvantaged kids. Seriously, it was entertaining and disturbing at once, and I liked watching Rani interact with the kids. Amisha was cool, but wore a dress that wasn't so child appropriate, to short of tight as I recall, probably driving the teen and preteen boys in the audience to impure thoughts. Saif acted like a cool frat boy the entire time, sitting in the audience, wearing a bandana, occasionaly smiling, but really showing that he couldn't wait to get out of there. Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy and director Kunal Kohli were also there. Anyway, it was like a reality version of a BW movie in that there was a big contest and show in an auditorium and the kids were street kids and orphans! There were even nuns in the audience. Did you see it? I even had my laptop handy and would look up the various orphanages and special schools the kids were representing as they were mentioned. Maybe I should review THAT bonus disc one day.
I think in comparing it to Ta Ra Rum Pum, I'd have to prefer TRRP. Damn! I can't believe I even wrote that, given my impression of TRRP. And if you want to remember my thoughts on TRRP...http://bollywoodfoodclub.wordpress.com/2008/07/26/bollywood-meets-nascar-ta-ra-rum-pum-2007/
Enjoyed your cleaver interpretation of the film!
All the best, Sita-ji
Hi Sita-ji! No, I didn't see the second disc; just the first was enough for me. LOL It does sound compelling though; I hope you end up reviewing it! And, darn it, I forgot to get the Rani changing Hollywood moment.
ReplyDeleteajnabi-ji,
ReplyDeleteI should maybe then go on to reveiw that bonus disc someday as a supplement to your review. I had the "Bollywood" sign as a banner for a while, but took it down, but I did insert it into this post for safe keeping, so go here and screen cap it karo:
http://bollywoodfoodclub.wordpress.com/2009/07/14/bollywood-taught-me-farsi/
All the best!
Sita-ji